Talking to some "Obi-wan Kenobi" on a primitive world (or a cab driver, haven't decided which) Jack decides he has to "renounce" Daniel. Which has the opposite effect: he now thinks about nothing but Daniel. In living bare-naked color. Doing all sorts of things they don't allow in the military. While he spends less time with Daniel, Jack decides that what he does in his mind is his own damned business, but he requires some research to get "adequate realism" and detail. He touches Daniel at various times, memorizing the size and shape of him, the weight of him as helps Daniel off the floor. The texture of his hair as he runs his hands through it, ruffling it playfully. The coffee and old books smell of him at briefings.
Daniel finally confronts him, says Jack is driving him crazy. Jack's out of reach, fine, he knows that but Jack has to stop testing the boundaries, toying with him.
Hunh? In his effort at "renouncing" Daniel and building up his own mental substitute it never once occurred to him that the real Daniel had even noticed, let alone was... was. Was. Would and could. And wanted to. Oh yeah. Oh hell. Oh shit.
So he lies and tells Daniel that he has no clue what he's talking about.
At the SGC Jack harrasses Daniel with all sorts of double entendres, still touching -- at this point Jack has no clue what going on in his own head except that he trying to do some sort of aversion therapy, or immersion therapy, or maybe something like what his dad did when he caught Jack smoking and made Jack smoke an entire pack until Jack was on the ground, puking. And Daniel is pissed. Sam gives Jack the big-eyed stare -- and god, she's cute -- and Teal'c looks disapproving though that could be Teal'c's usual face. One can never tell.
Jack goes to bug Daniel in his office leaning over him while he's reading, getting a hell of a thrill while irritating Daniel at the same time -- and Daniel sits up and leans back. So they start a game of physical chicken, angry and frustrated, yet Jack (and apparently Daniel) enjoys it as well.
Then one night at Daniel's place Jack's so turned on he wants to go to Daniel's bathroom and beat off but he's pretty sure that's not up there in Miss Manners' book (not to mention a little hard on the hand towels) and he leaves. Just leaves.
Outside on the sidewalk with the cars driving by, Daniel catches up to him. "What the fuck am I doing, Daniel?"
"I don't know."
He's had too much to drink so he takes a cab home, at his place he wants to break the pantry door again but it took three hours to fix and his downtime was all too rare. He pull out a beer, sits on the couch and decides: 1) he's gay, or bi, or whatever because, 2) he wants Daniel. Not in any temporary fantasy sort of way either. This has some serious ramifications because 3) Daniel wants him. He'd made that pretty damned clear.
Okay. Upside. Daniel has clearance, so there was no worries about telling him about what he did for a living, no wall between him and the rest of his life. It had been a problem for Sara sometimes, he had to admit. Downside? Well, there was the obvious.
Jack works it out in his mind, then picks up the phone to call Daniel, forgetting it's 5am. But Daniel doesn't pick up. Disappointed, Jack goes to turn off the porch light, only to discover Daniel's parked in the driveway. Asleep. It's dawn and they have to go to work the next day, so Jack gets Daniel up, gets Daniel into his bed, makes coffee.
Two hours later Daniel emerges, scratching his head and looking like he doesn't know where he is, and Jack beams at him. That just looks... right... to have a sleepy Daniel padding through his kitchen with a serious case of bedhead and morning breath. He gives Daniel coffee to jumpstart his brain and says simply, "It's okay, Daniel. It's okay."
the rest
Daniel finally confronts him, says Jack is driving him crazy. Jack's out of reach, fine, he knows that but Jack has to stop testing the boundaries, toying with him.
Hunh? In his effort at "renouncing" Daniel and building up his own mental substitute it never once occurred to him that the real Daniel had even noticed, let alone was... was. Was. Would and could. And wanted to. Oh yeah. Oh hell. Oh shit.
So he lies and tells Daniel that he has no clue what he's talking about.
At the SGC Jack harrasses Daniel with all sorts of double entendres, still touching -- at this point Jack has no clue what going on in his own head except that he trying to do some sort of aversion therapy, or immersion therapy, or maybe something like what his dad did when he caught Jack smoking and made Jack smoke an entire pack until Jack was on the ground, puking. And Daniel is pissed. Sam gives Jack the big-eyed stare -- and god, she's cute -- and Teal'c looks disapproving though that could be Teal'c's usual face. One can never tell.
Jack goes to bug Daniel in his office leaning over him while he's reading, getting a hell of a thrill while irritating Daniel at the same time -- and Daniel sits up and leans back. So they start a game of physical chicken, angry and frustrated, yet Jack (and apparently Daniel) enjoys it as well.
Then one night at Daniel's place Jack's so turned on he wants to go to Daniel's bathroom and beat off but he's pretty sure that's not up there in Miss Manners' book (not to mention a little hard on the hand towels) and he leaves. Just leaves.
Outside on the sidewalk with the cars driving by, Daniel catches up to him. "What the fuck am I doing, Daniel?"
"I don't know."
He's had too much to drink so he takes a cab home, at his place he wants to break the pantry door again but it took three hours to fix and his downtime was all too rare. He pull out a beer, sits on the couch and decides: 1) he's gay, or bi, or whatever because, 2) he wants Daniel. Not in any temporary fantasy sort of way either. This has some serious ramifications because 3) Daniel wants him. He'd made that pretty damned clear.
Okay. Upside. Daniel has clearance, so there was no worries about telling him about what he did for a living, no wall between him and the rest of his life. It had been a problem for Sara sometimes, he had to admit. Downside? Well, there was the obvious.
Jack works it out in his mind, then picks up the phone to call Daniel, forgetting it's 5am. But Daniel doesn't pick up. Disappointed, Jack goes to turn off the porch light, only to discover Daniel's parked in the driveway. Asleep. It's dawn and they have to go to work the next day, so Jack gets Daniel up, gets Daniel into his bed, makes coffee.
Two hours later Daniel emerges, scratching his head and looking like he doesn't know where he is, and Jack beams at him. That just looks... right... to have a sleepy Daniel padding through his kitchen with a serious case of bedhead and morning breath. He gives Daniel coffee to jumpstart his brain and says simply, "It's okay, Daniel. It's okay."
Icarus