Replacement dog for Christmas

[icarus]

Replacement Dog: A Christmas Story

A coworker of my aunt's had to take a day off because she needed to get a "replacement dog."

Mom: "Replacement dog?"
Me: "Their one-year-old dog died very suddenly. So she was a getting a similar dog to replace him. And a black magic marker."
Mom: ?
Me: "Apparently he doesn't have the right number of spots. So she's going to draw the spots on."
Mom: "How old is her daughter?"
Me: "Fourteen."
Mom: "Oh, fuck-a-duck. That's never going to work!"
Me: "Maybe if she were three...."
Mom: "And maybe not even then."
Me: "She'll be hearing about this till she's sixty. Aunt J. wished her luck."
Mom: "That's what I like about my sister. She knows when to just listen."

The end. Or rather, the beginning.

Though we'll never know what happened.