I got a straight straw in my flex-i-straw box: Lessons on customer service.

I got a straight straw in my flex-i-straw box: Lessons on customer service.

I worked in customer service for a while and was surprisingly good at it. The big secret of customer service turned out to be: the customers don't expect help.

Oh, sure, they'd like help. They say they want help. But usually when they're angry or upset, they expect opposition.

This made my job very easy. I mean, sure, I had unhappy people on the line. But 90% of it was solved just by listening. "You got a straight straw in your box of flex-i-straws?" Being surprised at the problem. "You're kidding. Really?" If it wasn't clear, asking concerned questions. "Wow. I wonder how that could happen... how many straight straws? One? Two? Hmm. Okay."

Suddenly, they had an ally on the inside. Someone who listened. Who understood the problem.

It was important to take every concern--no matter how silly it seemed--very seriously. They bought flex-i-straws. They got a straight straw. They should not have. I may not know why it's a big deal. Maybe they're in a body cast and have to have flex-i-straws. The point is: they're upset and my job was to resolve that upset more than anything else.

The next secret to customer service turned out to be: find out what the customer wants.

Don't ask point blank. They often don't know. They'll often say things that they know won't happen--and that's when they're still in the state of not believing you'll do anything, so they might as well ask for the moon. So commiserate. Draw what they really want out of them with open-ended questions. It's often surprising how little they want. Often they just want to complain. Or else ... "I-I want a replacement flex-i-straw."

One. Singular.

"How 'bout I send you a whole box?"

"Oh. Really?"

"Sure!"

Over the years I've been amazed at the people I meet in customer service who manage to pour gasoline on simple matters. I'd see the moment where they were supposed to ask, in a concerned voice, brows drawn together, "What happened?"

And then they'd blow it.

( ... They'd give a canned response straight from the company teleprompter. )

( ... They'd get defensive, identifying with the company not the customer )

( ... There was the dreaded phrase, 'I realize you're upset....' )

( ... Then there's leaping into action ... )

Usually, customers just want someone to care. It's not hard to give that.