SGA: Appalling Hurt/Comfort ficlet - John/Rodney - PG

[icarus]

See, in real life I can't even tell a joke because I can't make it to the punchline without laughing.

iibnf confessed her love of appalling OOC over-the-top Hurt/Comfort fics and I just couldn't resist writing her one. This is John/Rodney, Hurt/Comfort, post-"Trinity" tag (of course).

Appalling Hurt/Comfort Fic


Late at night, when no one could see, Rodney laid his head on his keyboard and sobbed as softly as he could. The echoes still seemed loud in the empty halls of Atlantis.

Everyone was avoiding him. John had asked that he to be removed from active duty. Heightmeyer, her chin tipped haughtily, claimed her schedule was full. On the range the marines made him fetch his own paper targets, by hand, and kept firing when he did. The internal Atlantis poll rated him ten points lower than Kavanagh -- Kavanagh! -- and only five points above the Wraith. Atlantis itself seemed to have picked up on the pervading mood. Doors refused to open, and then shut quickly behind him as Rodney skittered through. He'd had to cut his jacket free yesterday as Atlantis personnel walked by, heedless of his pleas for help. He could take a hint.

The enormity of his mistake weighed on Rodney. He hadn't felt so ostracized since he'd blown up the high school gym the week before prom night, or that time he'd obliterated Northwestern's new chem lab, or the time in Area 51 when he'd vaporized their first working F-302. At least then people yelled at him or gave him swirlies, instead of this deafening silence.

Rodney didn't care any more. He sobbed louder.

"Rodney-?"

John? Oh no! It was John. Rodney quickly sat up and wiped his face on his sleeve. "Oh, gee, I must have fallen asleep," Rodney said, his eyes red-rimmed.

John kneeled down beside him, his hand on Rodney's knee. "That didn't sound like you were sleeping."

Rodney gazed at John, at a loss as to what to say. Everyone knew he was a terrible liar, except for when - except for when he said he could outsmart the Ancients... Rodney burst into tears and seized John's lapel, sobbing into his shoulder. John stiffened, startled, and then his warm hand rubbed gentle circles on Rodney's back.

"Hey... it's okay," John murmured softly into the back of Rodney's neck.

"Really?" Rodney looked up at him, blue eyes filled with sudden vulnerable hope.

John shrugged. "What's a solar system between friends? We've got a lot of spares in the Pegasus Galaxy."

"Even though I blew up the only working model of an intergalactic space weapon we may never be able to recreate?"

John looked pained. He shut his eyes, thumb and forefinger pressed to his forehead. "It didn't work anyways."

Rodney sighed miserably. "No, I suppose it didn't. And the next experiment would probably have destroyed all life as we know it."

"So there you are." John spread his hands and brightened. He wiped Rodney's tear-stained face. "I have to tell you, you're a bit of a mess." He cupped Rodney's chin and smiled.

Rodney snuffled and wiped his nose on his sleeve. "I am." He tried to smile. John patted his back and stood.

"In fact, I'd say you need a bath." The look John gave Rodney was fond.

Rodney frowned, perplexed. "We don't have any baths in Atlantis. Just showers."

John was smug. "That was before I had the Roman Bath installed in my quarters yesterday." He grinned. "There has to be some perks to this job."

Rodney staggered to his feet, bemused, unable to believe John had forgiven him this quickly. A part in the back of his mind still waited for the other shoe to fall. Well... other twenty shoes.

John was saying, as he slung an arm around Rodney's shoulders, "There's nothing like some nude frolicking in a Roman Bath to make you feel like yourself at the end of a day. C'mon!"

"Yeah, okay," Rodney said submissively. "That would be nice."



Ha! I got him to cry three times in less than a page. And not_sally called me a sick fuck. I am so proud.

Comments

[miss-pryss.livejournal.com]

My new favorite SGA story, no question.

OMG ANGST!!!1!!

[icarusancalion.livejournal.com]

*evil chuckle* Next up: predictable cuddling in the Roman Bath.

Icarus

[dar-jeeling.livejournal.com]

Oh God. I'm not sure how I should react to that. ;) *laughs helplessly*

[icarusancalion.livejournal.com]

LOL! Good!

I admit, I kept stopping to laugh as I wrote it. The... hee-hee... paper targets... hee-hee... still shooting... *makes snorfling sound*

Icarus

[brandinsbabe.livejournal.com]

hehehehe. so much crying indeed! amazing ;)

[icarusancalion.livejournal.com]

I suppose, technically, it's only one crying jag. But it's all in how you count the start and end points.

Icarus

[electricandroid.livejournal.com]

I dont know whether to love you. Or to go and pout lye into my eye sockets.

See, I'm watching SGA now - managed to DL it.

AND THIS HURTS ME MY PRECIOUS.

Cannot tempt you to write something with Carson in it? Can I? God I want to do dirty things to that accent.

[icarusancalion.livejournal.com]

Cannot tempt you to write something with Carson in it? Can I? God I want to do dirty things to that accent.

I'm all about the Rodney right now. And although David Hewlett and Paul make a great couple, I just can't inflict Rodney on the gentle Carson Beckett.

Icarus

[not-sally.livejournal.com]

You are and you should. *calls you squishy*

[icarusancalion.livejournal.com]

*beams, and is squished*

[millefiori.livejournal.com]

No, no, no, no! Something really horrible has to happen to Rodney first, *then* John can come to his senses and realize how mean he's been! See, first you have to make Rodney almost die in a tragic and very public way, working on something trivial and unimportant, located far, far away from all the meanies at the hub of the city. That way John gets to realize he's been an ass and everyone who was ever mean to Rodney feels very very small and sorry. :)

[teaphile.livejournal.com]

Don't forget that he has to lay around the infirmary bleeding out for a while, because Carson is too busy tending to poison ivy to sew up Rodney's gaping wound.

[aizjanika.livejournal.com]

:::loves:::

OMG! I love this story. hehe I'm still giggling at the ending. *g*

[icarusancalion.livejournal.com]

I should be ashamed of myself. I still ache at Rodney being caught in a door and everyone ignoring him....

Icarus

[teaphile.livejournal.com]

*snort*

"Solar system"? I could have sworn from reading those appalling post-Trinity h/c stories he blew up 5/6 of a galaxy. Sometimes even a universe.

[icarusancalion.livejournal.com]

"What's a universe (or two) between friends?"

[lillian78.livejournal.com]

I always said Rodney crying three times in a fic would make me gouge out my eyeballs. Have you seen any eyeballs rolling around lately? I seem to have misplaced mine. Hee!

[icarusancalion.livejournal.com]

I did it especially for you. (Yes, I saw your comment and counted to make sure I'd fit in at least three crying jags.)

Icarus

[rike-tikki-tavi.livejournal.com]

You know the only reason this doesn't make me want to scrub out my head with bleach and steel wool, is that my brain keeps coming up with ways how John really would react to Rodney sobbing uncontrollably into his shoulder. And that... makes me giggle like a loon.

Thanks.

[icarusancalion.livejournal.com]

What would John's real reaction be? *g* Seriously, I'd love to hear your take.

Icarus

[starrylizard.livejournal.com]

Must admit to being a sucker for the hurt/comfort too and this was highly amusing (partly because I LOVED it! :p)

John kneeled down beside him, his hand on Rodney's knee. "That didn't sound like you were sleeping."
I actually went awwww. I think that makes me a sickfuck. ...and the city locking dorrs on him. *giggles* That's just too much!

Hee. Sickfuck or not, you are on my friends list these days, so I can get your sickness as it emerges. (...and because I want more figureskating!fic)

[icarusancalion.livejournal.com]

You know, I'm dancing all around the skating fic right now. "Lalalalala, skating fic? What skating fic?" I want to leap ahead to the sex but they're so not into that. *heaves a sigh at them* Rodney's just being so uncharacteristically responsible (and so characteristically oblivious) and John, well, he's John.

Icarus

[lilysaid.livejournal.com]

hahahhaa, omg, this is perfectly fucked up and over the top. Sadly, this is EXACTLY the type of OOC H/C fic that are my guilty pleasure. I even have some bookmarked and have read them multiple times; bonus points if they're post-Trinity.

[icarusancalion.livejournal.com]

*grins* It's all for you guys. ;)

Icarus

[percysowner.livejournal.com]

This is great! I keep hitting the funny stories today, but this just takes the cake. So much Rodney angst.

[icarusancalion.livejournal.com]

It's tragic, absolutely tragic.

Icarus

[emrinalexander.livejournal.com]

This:

The enormity of his mistake weighed on Rodney. He hadn't felt so ostracized since he'd blown up the high school gym the week before prom night, or that time he'd obliterated Northwestern's new chem lab, or the time in Area 51 when he'd vaporized their first working F-302. At least then people yelled at him or gave him swirlies, instead of this deafening silence.

Made me laugh until I coughed up my spleen. But it was WORTH IT.

[icarusancalion.livejournal.com]

Made me laugh until I coughed up my spleen. But it was WORTH IT.

LOLOLOLOLOLOL! I love it when the comments are funnier than the fic.

Icarus

[bakarti.livejournal.com]

Oh, my. Words fail me.

I'll be on the lookout for a sequel!

[icarusancalion.livejournal.com]

I guess to be a true H/C fic it needs to be 90 parts and unfinished, right?

Icarus

[iibnf.livejournal.com]

I posted your DVDs this morning, by the way. Slight delay as it took me a while to accumulate all the required stamps. If you get the parcel and the stamps are not cancelled - please return at your leisure. I like to recycle ;D

You should get your parcel in about 2 weeks, more or less.

*hops around in happy, bouncy circles*

[icarusancalion.livejournal.com]

Will do. I'm writing you porn, but we have something else for you. :D

Icarus

[zoerayne]

Not only did you make Rodney cry three times in less than a page, you made me cry three times in less than a page.

Also? This story hurt, and not in the good way.

*g*

[icarusancalion.livejournal.com]

Clearly, I'm meaner than John. *g*

Icarus

[adafrog.livejournal.com]

LOL Great crack!

[icarusancalion.livejournal.com]

I'm still cracking up at your icon, and thank you. SGA: We're here for the Crack.

Icarus

[retrofit88.livejournal.com]

HA hah ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ah a hahaha.

ha.

and maybe snerk, too.

This is silly. :)

[icarusancalion.livejournal.com]

*buries face in sleeve and tries not to laugh in the library* Oh god. This was fun.

Icarus

[claudiasharon.livejournal.com]

Haha...nice. That was very entertaining, even if appalling. :P

[icarusancalion.livejournal.com]

*winks at you* Thanks, glad you liked.

Icarus

[cranberryink.livejournal.com]

Hehehehe. An excellent parody.

[icarusancalion.livejournal.com]

Dankeschoen!

Icarus

[cpt-untouchable.livejournal.com]

Ha! Brilliant. You had me on the first sob.

I'm such a whore for good h/c. I truly am. But the drek ... oh mercy, the drek.

[icarusancalion.livejournal.com]

Even in the drek there are worthy moments. Like pearls caught in the sinktrap -- along with the leftover scrapings from dinner and the catfood bowl. The real question: is it worth touching that stuff to get the goods?

Icarus

[flamesword.livejournal.com]

....I am extremely disturbed. XD

Also, I agree with not_sally.

[icarusancalion.livejournal.com]

*takes a bow* Thank you, thank you.

Icarus

[daemonluna.livejournal.com]

The internal Atlantis poll rated him ten points lower than Kavanagh -- Kavanagh! -- and only five points above the Wraith. Atlantis itself seemed to have picked up on the pervading mood. Doors refused to open, and then shut quickly behind him as Rodney skittered through. He'd had to cut his jacket free yesterday as Atlantis personnel walked by, heedless of his pleas for help. He could take a hint.

*loves* This is totally, perfectly badfic. Awesome!

[icarusancalion.livejournal.com]

*grins* Thank you!

Icarus