WG's new schedule

[icarus]

I came home last night and wildernessguru was sprawled on the couch, limp as a dishrag. He'd bought groceries but hadn't finished putting them away and I discovered the milk and yogurt were still in his pack.

"They are?" he said, barely able to drum up interest.

This is Mr. Neat, Mr. Thorough, the man whose drawers were so organized when we met I asked if he was in the military. (Close. As a firefighter he had to find his clothes in the dark.) The man who reorganizes the fridge to put away the orange juice.

I looked at his tired eyes and knew this was a man at the end of his rope. I set aside all my homework, put away the groceries, made dinner, and set him in front of a movie.

His work hours changed a few weeks ago from 7:00am - 3:30pm to 6:00am - 2:30pm, which means he now has to be up at 3:30 in the morning.

He does errands and gets home around four-thirty and tries to got to bed around 8 or 9 (both of which are too late) and we've given up all our TV shows, but he really doesn't get any sleep until 10pm. At best he's getting five hours a night. I stay up till midnight most nights. He says I don't keep him awake, but I know what happens to me in the morning.

When he gets up at 3:30, I wake up and then get two hours of fitful dozing while he bumps around. Then I wake up again at 5:15am when he heads out to work. I try to sleep after that; sometimes I do, sometimes I don't. He's a much lighter sleeper than me, so I bet those hours from 10pm - midnight aren't really sleep.

The way our schedules overlap, we're getting three hours sleep a night.

My last day of school is Friday and finals end Wednesday, so that'll solve it for the short term. The house is clean, we're fed, the cat's petted (always a priority) and we're surviving but, man, something has to give.

Comments

[piplover.livejournal.com]

I know it's not really helpful, but when I was in the Army, they informed us that the human body only needs 4 hours of sleep. I say this becuase, well, even though it really sucks, and you both must be tired as hell, your body will eventually adapt. Or you'll have a psychotic episode. Will his schedule change anytime soon back to what it was, or better hours?
Good luck to both of you, sleep deprivation totally sucks.

Ha. That sounds like the Army. :D

[icarusancalion.livejournal.com]

Well, based on that all we need to do is increase it by an hour.

Huh. That's probably why it was working fine when he got up at 4:30 but 3:30 is killing us.

Or you'll have a psychotic episode.

*laughs* Really. We'll have time to recover over Christmas.

His schedule won't revert. I tried going to bed when he did last night and it's the first time I've felt human in a while. On the other hand, I got nothing done, and getting up early... well, I'm not all that sharp first thing in the morning. Homework's a lost cause at 6 am.

Icarus

Re: Ha. That sounds like the Army. :D

[piplover.livejournal.com]

I hear that about homework. Before I joined the Army I used to get about 10 to 12 hours of sleep a night. Yeah, that didn't last. But I was stupid with lack of sleep, and after a while it really catches up to you.
I hope things work out for you, and things get better. Take care of yourselves.

[lebannen.livejournal.com]

Is it absolutely necessary to be getting up nearly two hours before leaving the house? I know it takes many people, myself most definitely included, a while to become properly caffeinated before being fit to appear in company, but surely if the sleep deprivation's getting that bad, the benefits of some extra sleep time would outweigh the other?

From your side of it, is housework, possibly even including starting the prep for dinner, possible in the morning? I know I can't do homework in the morning either, but sweeping floors and doing dishes aren't so bad - sharp knives, of course, may be a bit of an issue if your fine motor skills haven't quite woken up either.

Good luck.

[icarusancalion.livejournal.com]

These are all really good ideas, anything that can be done the night before (pre-slicing the lunch supplies on the weekend?).

Believe it or not, it does take WG 90 minutes to get ready, and no matter what's done the night before, it never takes him less.

He doesn't drink coffee but what he does is give himself time in the morning. Time to sit down and sip tea. Time to not be able to find his watch and search for it. He moves at the speed of a tree sloth at the best of times and is endlessly distractable. The dishes get washed. A plant gets watered. Some foul science project in the fridge gets tossed out.

The Puppy and once sat back when WG told us "I'll be ready in twenty minutes." While he took a quick shower and dressed in the next room (which did take twenty minutes) the Puppy and I predicted each one of WG's distractions:

The Puppy pointed at a stack of laundry. "He'll have to put away those clothes."

"Then he'll stop with a blank look and go back to get his wallet," I added.

"Uh-huh. Oh! And those catalogs must be moved," he laughed. "Can't have catalogs laying around."

"And don't forget the trash! He'll have to take out the trash," I reminded him, finger in the air. "He'll hit every single trash can in the house." I added, "Then the bag."

"Oh yes," the Puppy said in a mock English accent, "we've got to replace the bag."

WG looked puzzled as we roared with laughter as he picked up the catalogs, then the clothes, then....

"I stand corrected," I said, between giggles. "Catalogs, then clothes." By the time he got the trash cans we were dying. It was also an hour later.

Several days this week he's rebelled against the 3:30 alarm and gotten up later, but it doesn't work for him. He ends up stressed and unhappy in the morning.

We tease about this, but he does know how to set things up in a way that works for him. Also, he's a lot cleaner than the Puppy and I.

From your side of it, is housework possible in the morning?

Er. I have to admit he gets to most of the housework before it even crosses my mind.

Icarus

[lebannen.livejournal.com]

He moves at the speed of a tree sloth at the best of times and is endlessly distractable.

Oh dear. He really does sound like me, only tidier. My family mocked me when I signed up for a career where early mornings and broken sleep are required, but I was seeing the plus side of it - zero commute time, and someone else to do the catering, not to mention mid-day downtime where a siesta is usually acceptable. I've managed to adapt to the morning thing for the medium term, with a horrible jump-start for those non-routine occasions when there's a knock on the door and 15 minutes notice that the day's starting earlier than expected, but obviously he's been doing his job a lot longer than I've had mine so it would be harder to change the routine. Whether I'll be able to keep my routine (currently alarm to exit in one hour, previous version 40 minutes when it didn't involve standing in a queue to get breakfast, not that the queue is more than 5 of those minutes) long-term remains to be seen, but I think it will.

Once again, good luck.

[ethlinda.livejournal.com]

Could you adjust your schedule too? Why don't you get to bed before midnight? Does he really need to be up an hour & 45 minutes before he leaves the house?

After spending years working in bakeries the best advice I can give you is to try to do as much as possible the night before: shower the night before; make lunch & even breakfast the night before; putting everything he'll need to take for the day in his bag, or the equivalent; if he drives, it could even go in the car the night before; even lay out the days clothing - I used to lay it out leading away from the bed in the order I would put it on as I stumbled past. Do what you can to cut that time down.

Naps are also good but it takes some people a while to train themselves to sleep productively in the afternoon. It seems strange to talk about productive sleep but you know what I mean, right?

If it comes to it, I recommend Valerian Root as a herbal sleep aid. It doesn't make you fall asleep & it doesn't make you harder to wake up so there's nothing to worry about in that regard. It just makes you drowsy. My mother's an insomniac so I have some idea what I'm talking about here but, of course, "Always seek proper advice. I'm not a doctor...blah blah blah"

I hope it helps.

[icarusancalion.livejournal.com]

I answered the one question above: yep, that's how long it takes him. WG's famous for not exactly being a speed-demon in the morning or, well, ever. :D

I tried going to bed early with him and sleep-wise that helped us both. I discovered that doing my homework in the morning instead of at night didn't work out nearly as well, (he's slow-moving in the morning, I'm merely fuzzy-headed). But maybe if I were getting up on that schedule more regularly....

Icarus

[lherelenfeline.livejournal.com]

Dunno what to tell ya, only that when i was on that sort of a scedule when i was working as an HIV councillior, there was a whole lot of napping done.

[icarusancalion.livejournal.com]

Naps sound like good idea.

[alyndra]

*offers hugs*

Man, I'm sorry. That sounds like it really sucks. At least the end's in sight, though.

[icarusancalion.livejournal.com]

Classes are out as of today, I just have three finals and lots of studying to do. :)

I came home, crashed, and slept all afternoon till one in the morning. WG has the weekend off and we're both snuggled half-asleep on the couch.

Icarus

[harveywallbang.livejournal.com]

poor WG :(

[icarusancalion.livejournal.com]

Yes, this schedule is a bit much.

Icarus