(no subject)
Mar. 19th, 2003 09:32 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
icarusOn Harry and Draco characterisations
Good work.
Here's a really rough Draco/Ron story... Reunion. Nothing to do with 'Beg Me for It' actually. I don't think. I just got distracted while trying to write my Boozefest, wondering, why do people always think that teenage lovers will end up together for life? What would it be like if they went their separate ways, and met up again later? Ten years later?
Unfinished, unbeta'd, not even spellchecked as I typed it directly into this journal.
Reunion
by Icarus
The knock sounded again, and Ron set down his beer wondering what the heck...? as he blinked and wandered to the door. He ran through a mental list of just who might show up after 10pm, up to and including his soon-to-be ex-wife, and came up empty. He'd set his Wards to alert him to any of the usual suspects, but perhaps Louisa had found a way around it. He peeked through the side window. If it was his wife, he'd just as soon she stayed on the porch. There was nothing more to say.
A man stood on the front porch, dressed in an elegant black cape. He was slapping a pair of broom-riding gloves impatiently into his palm. He looked a little anxious, and utterly out of place in this neighborhood. Someone dressed like that ought to be going to the Opera. The white-blonde hair reminded ron of Lucius Malfoy, but it was short, and the man's face was more delicate. Besides, Lucius was dead.
Draco -? It had been years.
Ron opened the door, brushing at his hair with his fingers.
"I was in the neighborhood..." Draco began.
"Not dressed like that you weren't," Ron interjected.
"Let me finish, I have a good excuse: I was in the neighborhood and, uh, my broom broke down and... oh, Merlin's arse, see what you've done? I don't recall the rest of it now." Draco ran his hand through his hair. "May I come in?"
Ron nodded mutely, staring and adding up the changes in this figure from his past. Draco was probably doing the same, and Ron was suddenly intensely aware of the fact he hadn't shaved and was wearing a grubby old T-shirt and just his boxers. Not to mention the dishes in the sink. But hell, it was late. What was Draco doing here?
"I left my wife," Draco said, as if this were 'hello' or 'good evening.' "A few hours ago... maybe more. I dunno, what time is it? I've been walking."
"10:37. Thought you said you flew."
"Eight hours then, wow. Oh. My... it's late, isn't it?" Draco said in abstracted tone.
"That would explain the fact it's dark out, yes."
" 'M'sorry. Didn't realise the time. I'll come back..." Draco started to leave.
"No, it's all right." Ron scrubbed at his eyes. "Would you like some tea?" Tea was mum's solution to everything. Ron supposed that included surprise late-night visitors.
Draco nodded and pulled off his cape, looking about for a servant to hand it to. Ron took it and hung it up, then went into the kitchen to make tea. The water was probably still hot.
"Nice place you have here," Draco called out from the living room.
Ron returned with the tea. "No, it isn't."
"It was a polite thing to say," Draco looked peeved.
"It's bullshit. You don't have to be polite to me," Ron snorted. "It's me? Remember -?"
Draco smiled a little, relaxing for the first time since he stepped through Ron's door. A gold ring sparkled on his left hand. Ron's own hand still had a white mark where his had been. It looked naked.
"Nice shit-hole you've got here, Weasley."
"Thanks," Ron laughed, "don't mention it."
Draco's hands played around the rim of the cup as he stared into it as though trying to read the future in the tea leaves. "I left my wife," he said.
"You mentioned that," Ron nodded.
"I did? Rather sudden of me," Draco said, still staring at the tea. It wasn't clear if he meant his words, or his departure. Ron thought he meant the latter. The Draco he knew was rarely concerned with how he affected other people.
"I heard you were living alone," Draco said. "Strange. I always thought you were the marrying type, pop out a new litter of Weasleys..."
"Yeah. Me too. Didn't work out."
"Divorce?"
"Not yet," Ron said.
"I'm sorry."
"Guess I'm not that easy to live with..." Ron sighed.
"Bullshit! You were great to live with," Draco said. "You never learned to read between the lines. You just believe people. She's full of it. Trust me."
Ron didn't have anything to say to that. They drank their tea quietly. The fire crackled, and Ron glanced up. But it was just the wood, there was no one in the Floo. He was still looking around at sounds, expecting other people in the house.
"I do have kids though," Ron added, as a sudden afterthought.
"Really?"
"Four. Three boys and a girl."
"Small brood for a Weasley," Draco observed casually. Ron was reminded of Lucius again. But he looked like Draco. The changes were somewhat disconcerting.
Ron smiled warmly. He had never wanted any of his kids to be overshadowed like he had been.
"Fred and George have more than made up for that. Between the kids they had before they were married..."
Draco snickered, "I heard about that... what do they do, go from house to house like some kind of bumblebees?" His eyes sparkled impishly, and he looked very much like Draco at that moment.
"I still can't get all the girlfriend's names straight..." Ron shook his head.
"I have a little girl," Draco said with a proud smile. The smile suddenly slipped. "She's not going to be too happy with Daddy today."
"She'll forgive you."
Draco looked up.
Ron shrugged. "She's daddy's girl, right?"
"Yeah..." Draco's smile was distant and wistful. Draco let his head fall back to the couch with a sigh. How many times had Ron seen him relaxed like that, staring at the ceiling as if he could see in the dark? Ron's heart speeded up with the memories.
"So," Ron asked the fifty-Galleon question, "why are you here?"
Draco's voice was faint. "I don't know. I was just walking and didn't have anywhere to go."
Ron said, "If it helps, you're just as good-looking as ever."
"It doesn't, but thanks anyway." Draco's face rolled towards him. "You look exactly the same, Ron. It's amazing. Isn't that even the same shitty T-shirt from ten years ago? I thought I threw it out."
Ron chuckled. "I fished it out of the trash. More than once if I remember right. But, no, this is a new one."
"They made more than one like that? Why?"
Ron stood up, and began leading Draco by the arm to his bedroom.
"C'mon. You didn't come here to discuss T-shirts."
Draco followed him.
"You always were fast, Weasley."
The bedroom door closed with a click. Hands whispered over shoulders and T-shirts against silk. Hard kisses in the dark, warm wet sounds, and an almost forgotten sensation of a man's hard chest pressed up against his own. Draco was so slim and firm... he smelled like cologne, expensive cologne... like if he were on a menu you couldn't ask the price. Ron liked the idea of Draco being on a menu, but he felt a little shaky all of the sudden.
Ron murmured into the kiss, "... it's, uh, been a long time since I've done this with a bloke..." Not that he wanted it to stop, no. No way. That wonderful hand squeezed the front of his boxers.
"First aggressive," Draco smiled breathlessly, and he attacked Ron's ears, "now shy... haven't changed a bit, Ron.."
Draco's hands were smooth, expert, urgent. Almost as insistent as the heat between Ron's legs. Ron's body remembered pleasant sensation of aggressive hands sliding up under his shirt, tugging down his boxers, even if he had forgotten till this moment. Missed this. Missed Draco. Yes.
"..let me clear off the bed..." Ron whispered anxiously as they toppled onto it.
"Forget it, Weasley," Draco hissed, pressing himself between Ron's legs. Ron could feel him, hard, through the fabric of his trousers. Oh. Yeah. The clothes had to go. How did Draco manage to strip Ron so fast?
"Want you on top..." Ron said, his voice choked. Draco nodded, and his belt jangled as he pulled his trousers down, hurriedly. Ron liked the thought of that perfect pleat trampled on the floor, as his legs were raised over Draco's shoulders. A hot wet tongue teased at Ron's cock. Draco's eyes were intense and burning into Ron in the near-dark. Ron tousled that perfect hair, grunted, oh, as Draco stroked him.
"..oil..." Draco breathed.
Ron shook his head. "No oil. Lotion. Top drawer."
"That's no good..." he complained.
"It'll have to do. Call ahead next time. Told you, it's been a while..." Ron's hands slid through Draco's hair of their own accord.
Draco kissed the head of Ron's cock... Ron had forgotten he always did that... the sheets rustled as Draco rolled across the bed and returned with the lotion. It was shockingly cold against his arse, and Ron's hand wrapped around a familiar smooth cock. Draco's was nice, small, but really straight. Ron remembered this part, vividly.
"Let me..." Ron panted, taking the lotion.
So pale and beautiful on his knees above Ron, Draco nodded. His chin lifted as Ron pulled out of him that moan. Yes. Like it, Malfoy? Draco's slick fingers began driving into him, and Ron stroked harder. Their hands moved in time and Ron began to rock back onto him as Draco thrust into his hand. Ron wanted to lick that cock, that slid under his thumb.
"C'mon," Ron growled, pressing into Draco's hands, hard.
"You're not ready," Draco gasped.
"Good enough dammit..." Ron bit his lip and panted.
It wasn't enough, Ron grit his teeth as it burned. It was like his first time. Draco was beyond stopping as he drove into Ron, but he was more gradual than he'd ever been, more graceful, more... oh, more! Ron wanted more, as Draco hit that spot.
~*~*~
They lay sweaty and tangled together in Ron's bed, still panting slightly. Draco pulled a sneaker out from underneath himself, with a quizzical look, and tossed it aside. Ron shoved the (formerly clean) laundry onto the floor and wrapped the sheets over them.
"Told you it had been a while..."
Draco chuckled, "Looking all over for basics like oil... You're the responsible one."
"What are you blaming me for?"
"Because it's your fault," Draco said reasonably.
"How?!"
"I don't know, but I'll find a way." Draco said. "Merlin, this's like being back at school."
"Yeah. 'Cept it's not likely Harry will walk in on us."
They laughed at the humiliating memory in the boy's shower. "Oh shit... I never thought I'd get a hard on again after that."
Draco's arm, at once familiar and strange, carressed Ron's shoulders. His hand tickled circles on Ron's chest. Ron hadn't felt so good in... he couldn't remember how long. He smiled up at the ceiling, grateful tomorrow was Saturday.
Draco sighed heavily. The circles stopped. "I have decided you married a complete bitch."
Ron snorted a laugh. "How's that?"
"Because she doesn't think you're wonderful, and you are. So she must be a horrible, horrible bitch. A hag. A harpy..."
"What does that say about me?" Ron complained. "And don't talk about my wife, please?"
"Ex-wife."
Ron sighed. "Just don't. Makes me feel like I'm cheating on her somehow."
"Was she?" Draco asked the ceiling. He turned towards Ron.
"What?"
"Cheating on you."
Damn Draco's perceptiveness. Ron was silent.
"I cheated on my wife horribly," Draco said casually. "Flagrantly. Frequently. She didn't care. Didn't give a damn. She had the Malfoy name.. the Malfoy money..."
"Sounds like you're the one who married a bitch. A plastic one."
"No argument there. I picked a blonde, any blonde, so we could mint out blonde children that looked just like me. That way I didn't have to think of the female half of the equation. Plastic suited me fine."
"So what happened?"
"I started turning plastic." Draco looked horrified. "Who knew it was contagious."
Draco was quiet a moment. "Guessed I wanted to see some life out of her, even if our life together was bullshit."
Ron frowned with a sudden thought. "So, are you splitting up the Malfoy estate then?"
"What?! No! I'm a Malfoy. I plan better than that - haven't you ever heard of marriage contracts? She gets supported in the manner in which she has grown accustomed. No doubt the blonde will continue unchanged. Unaffected as ever by my presence or lack of it. Kind of like a female Binns...."
"Can't have been much of a life for her..." Ron observed.
"What -?" Draco looked puzzled. "Oh. I didn't put in the usual no-fooling-around clause. She just... never did. I checked."
"That dead?"
"That dead. It was very disappointing. I expected something torrid."
Then Draco grinned at Ron, fiercely. "But you haven't changed. If you weren't so tight I wouldn't've believed it had been so long for you."
Ron eyebrows flicked up, and he blushed a little as he glanced at Draco.
"So... tell me. Who was the last bloke you slept with?"
"You really want to know?" Ron asked. Draco waited expectantly, a mischievous smile on his face.
"You."
"Really?"
"Don't look so smug." Draco's smile broadened as Ron chided him. "I'll have you know I've had plenty of women."
"They don't count." Draco stretched.
"Only in your book."
More coming. Check back.
Good work.
Here's a really rough Draco/Ron story... Reunion. Nothing to do with 'Beg Me for It' actually. I don't think. I just got distracted while trying to write my Boozefest, wondering, why do people always think that teenage lovers will end up together for life? What would it be like if they went their separate ways, and met up again later? Ten years later?
Unfinished, unbeta'd, not even spellchecked as I typed it directly into this journal.
Reunion
by Icarus
The knock sounded again, and Ron set down his beer wondering what the heck...? as he blinked and wandered to the door. He ran through a mental list of just who might show up after 10pm, up to and including his soon-to-be ex-wife, and came up empty. He'd set his Wards to alert him to any of the usual suspects, but perhaps Louisa had found a way around it. He peeked through the side window. If it was his wife, he'd just as soon she stayed on the porch. There was nothing more to say.
A man stood on the front porch, dressed in an elegant black cape. He was slapping a pair of broom-riding gloves impatiently into his palm. He looked a little anxious, and utterly out of place in this neighborhood. Someone dressed like that ought to be going to the Opera. The white-blonde hair reminded ron of Lucius Malfoy, but it was short, and the man's face was more delicate. Besides, Lucius was dead.
Draco -? It had been years.
Ron opened the door, brushing at his hair with his fingers.
"I was in the neighborhood..." Draco began.
"Not dressed like that you weren't," Ron interjected.
"Let me finish, I have a good excuse: I was in the neighborhood and, uh, my broom broke down and... oh, Merlin's arse, see what you've done? I don't recall the rest of it now." Draco ran his hand through his hair. "May I come in?"
Ron nodded mutely, staring and adding up the changes in this figure from his past. Draco was probably doing the same, and Ron was suddenly intensely aware of the fact he hadn't shaved and was wearing a grubby old T-shirt and just his boxers. Not to mention the dishes in the sink. But hell, it was late. What was Draco doing here?
"I left my wife," Draco said, as if this were 'hello' or 'good evening.' "A few hours ago... maybe more. I dunno, what time is it? I've been walking."
"10:37. Thought you said you flew."
"Eight hours then, wow. Oh. My... it's late, isn't it?" Draco said in abstracted tone.
"That would explain the fact it's dark out, yes."
" 'M'sorry. Didn't realise the time. I'll come back..." Draco started to leave.
"No, it's all right." Ron scrubbed at his eyes. "Would you like some tea?" Tea was mum's solution to everything. Ron supposed that included surprise late-night visitors.
Draco nodded and pulled off his cape, looking about for a servant to hand it to. Ron took it and hung it up, then went into the kitchen to make tea. The water was probably still hot.
"Nice place you have here," Draco called out from the living room.
Ron returned with the tea. "No, it isn't."
"It was a polite thing to say," Draco looked peeved.
"It's bullshit. You don't have to be polite to me," Ron snorted. "It's me? Remember -?"
Draco smiled a little, relaxing for the first time since he stepped through Ron's door. A gold ring sparkled on his left hand. Ron's own hand still had a white mark where his had been. It looked naked.
"Nice shit-hole you've got here, Weasley."
"Thanks," Ron laughed, "don't mention it."
Draco's hands played around the rim of the cup as he stared into it as though trying to read the future in the tea leaves. "I left my wife," he said.
"You mentioned that," Ron nodded.
"I did? Rather sudden of me," Draco said, still staring at the tea. It wasn't clear if he meant his words, or his departure. Ron thought he meant the latter. The Draco he knew was rarely concerned with how he affected other people.
"I heard you were living alone," Draco said. "Strange. I always thought you were the marrying type, pop out a new litter of Weasleys..."
"Yeah. Me too. Didn't work out."
"Divorce?"
"Not yet," Ron said.
"I'm sorry."
"Guess I'm not that easy to live with..." Ron sighed.
"Bullshit! You were great to live with," Draco said. "You never learned to read between the lines. You just believe people. She's full of it. Trust me."
Ron didn't have anything to say to that. They drank their tea quietly. The fire crackled, and Ron glanced up. But it was just the wood, there was no one in the Floo. He was still looking around at sounds, expecting other people in the house.
"I do have kids though," Ron added, as a sudden afterthought.
"Really?"
"Four. Three boys and a girl."
"Small brood for a Weasley," Draco observed casually. Ron was reminded of Lucius again. But he looked like Draco. The changes were somewhat disconcerting.
Ron smiled warmly. He had never wanted any of his kids to be overshadowed like he had been.
"Fred and George have more than made up for that. Between the kids they had before they were married..."
Draco snickered, "I heard about that... what do they do, go from house to house like some kind of bumblebees?" His eyes sparkled impishly, and he looked very much like Draco at that moment.
"I still can't get all the girlfriend's names straight..." Ron shook his head.
"I have a little girl," Draco said with a proud smile. The smile suddenly slipped. "She's not going to be too happy with Daddy today."
"She'll forgive you."
Draco looked up.
Ron shrugged. "She's daddy's girl, right?"
"Yeah..." Draco's smile was distant and wistful. Draco let his head fall back to the couch with a sigh. How many times had Ron seen him relaxed like that, staring at the ceiling as if he could see in the dark? Ron's heart speeded up with the memories.
"So," Ron asked the fifty-Galleon question, "why are you here?"
Draco's voice was faint. "I don't know. I was just walking and didn't have anywhere to go."
Ron said, "If it helps, you're just as good-looking as ever."
"It doesn't, but thanks anyway." Draco's face rolled towards him. "You look exactly the same, Ron. It's amazing. Isn't that even the same shitty T-shirt from ten years ago? I thought I threw it out."
Ron chuckled. "I fished it out of the trash. More than once if I remember right. But, no, this is a new one."
"They made more than one like that? Why?"
Ron stood up, and began leading Draco by the arm to his bedroom.
"C'mon. You didn't come here to discuss T-shirts."
Draco followed him.
"You always were fast, Weasley."
The bedroom door closed with a click. Hands whispered over shoulders and T-shirts against silk. Hard kisses in the dark, warm wet sounds, and an almost forgotten sensation of a man's hard chest pressed up against his own. Draco was so slim and firm... he smelled like cologne, expensive cologne... like if he were on a menu you couldn't ask the price. Ron liked the idea of Draco being on a menu, but he felt a little shaky all of the sudden.
Ron murmured into the kiss, "... it's, uh, been a long time since I've done this with a bloke..." Not that he wanted it to stop, no. No way. That wonderful hand squeezed the front of his boxers.
"First aggressive," Draco smiled breathlessly, and he attacked Ron's ears, "now shy... haven't changed a bit, Ron.."
Draco's hands were smooth, expert, urgent. Almost as insistent as the heat between Ron's legs. Ron's body remembered pleasant sensation of aggressive hands sliding up under his shirt, tugging down his boxers, even if he had forgotten till this moment. Missed this. Missed Draco. Yes.
"..let me clear off the bed..." Ron whispered anxiously as they toppled onto it.
"Forget it, Weasley," Draco hissed, pressing himself between Ron's legs. Ron could feel him, hard, through the fabric of his trousers. Oh. Yeah. The clothes had to go. How did Draco manage to strip Ron so fast?
"Want you on top..." Ron said, his voice choked. Draco nodded, and his belt jangled as he pulled his trousers down, hurriedly. Ron liked the thought of that perfect pleat trampled on the floor, as his legs were raised over Draco's shoulders. A hot wet tongue teased at Ron's cock. Draco's eyes were intense and burning into Ron in the near-dark. Ron tousled that perfect hair, grunted, oh, as Draco stroked him.
"..oil..." Draco breathed.
Ron shook his head. "No oil. Lotion. Top drawer."
"That's no good..." he complained.
"It'll have to do. Call ahead next time. Told you, it's been a while..." Ron's hands slid through Draco's hair of their own accord.
Draco kissed the head of Ron's cock... Ron had forgotten he always did that... the sheets rustled as Draco rolled across the bed and returned with the lotion. It was shockingly cold against his arse, and Ron's hand wrapped around a familiar smooth cock. Draco's was nice, small, but really straight. Ron remembered this part, vividly.
"Let me..." Ron panted, taking the lotion.
So pale and beautiful on his knees above Ron, Draco nodded. His chin lifted as Ron pulled out of him that moan. Yes. Like it, Malfoy? Draco's slick fingers began driving into him, and Ron stroked harder. Their hands moved in time and Ron began to rock back onto him as Draco thrust into his hand. Ron wanted to lick that cock, that slid under his thumb.
"C'mon," Ron growled, pressing into Draco's hands, hard.
"You're not ready," Draco gasped.
"Good enough dammit..." Ron bit his lip and panted.
It wasn't enough, Ron grit his teeth as it burned. It was like his first time. Draco was beyond stopping as he drove into Ron, but he was more gradual than he'd ever been, more graceful, more... oh, more! Ron wanted more, as Draco hit that spot.
~*~*~
They lay sweaty and tangled together in Ron's bed, still panting slightly. Draco pulled a sneaker out from underneath himself, with a quizzical look, and tossed it aside. Ron shoved the (formerly clean) laundry onto the floor and wrapped the sheets over them.
"Told you it had been a while..."
Draco chuckled, "Looking all over for basics like oil... You're the responsible one."
"What are you blaming me for?"
"Because it's your fault," Draco said reasonably.
"How?!"
"I don't know, but I'll find a way." Draco said. "Merlin, this's like being back at school."
"Yeah. 'Cept it's not likely Harry will walk in on us."
They laughed at the humiliating memory in the boy's shower. "Oh shit... I never thought I'd get a hard on again after that."
Draco's arm, at once familiar and strange, carressed Ron's shoulders. His hand tickled circles on Ron's chest. Ron hadn't felt so good in... he couldn't remember how long. He smiled up at the ceiling, grateful tomorrow was Saturday.
Draco sighed heavily. The circles stopped. "I have decided you married a complete bitch."
Ron snorted a laugh. "How's that?"
"Because she doesn't think you're wonderful, and you are. So she must be a horrible, horrible bitch. A hag. A harpy..."
"What does that say about me?" Ron complained. "And don't talk about my wife, please?"
"Ex-wife."
Ron sighed. "Just don't. Makes me feel like I'm cheating on her somehow."
"Was she?" Draco asked the ceiling. He turned towards Ron.
"What?"
"Cheating on you."
Damn Draco's perceptiveness. Ron was silent.
"I cheated on my wife horribly," Draco said casually. "Flagrantly. Frequently. She didn't care. Didn't give a damn. She had the Malfoy name.. the Malfoy money..."
"Sounds like you're the one who married a bitch. A plastic one."
"No argument there. I picked a blonde, any blonde, so we could mint out blonde children that looked just like me. That way I didn't have to think of the female half of the equation. Plastic suited me fine."
"So what happened?"
"I started turning plastic." Draco looked horrified. "Who knew it was contagious."
Draco was quiet a moment. "Guessed I wanted to see some life out of her, even if our life together was bullshit."
Ron frowned with a sudden thought. "So, are you splitting up the Malfoy estate then?"
"What?! No! I'm a Malfoy. I plan better than that - haven't you ever heard of marriage contracts? She gets supported in the manner in which she has grown accustomed. No doubt the blonde will continue unchanged. Unaffected as ever by my presence or lack of it. Kind of like a female Binns...."
"Can't have been much of a life for her..." Ron observed.
"What -?" Draco looked puzzled. "Oh. I didn't put in the usual no-fooling-around clause. She just... never did. I checked."
"That dead?"
"That dead. It was very disappointing. I expected something torrid."
Then Draco grinned at Ron, fiercely. "But you haven't changed. If you weren't so tight I wouldn't've believed it had been so long for you."
Ron eyebrows flicked up, and he blushed a little as he glanced at Draco.
"So... tell me. Who was the last bloke you slept with?"
"You really want to know?" Ron asked. Draco waited expectantly, a mischievous smile on his face.
"You."
"Really?"
"Don't look so smug." Draco's smile broadened as Ron chided him. "I'll have you know I've had plenty of women."
"They don't count." Draco stretched.
"Only in your book."
More coming. Check back.
![[identity profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/openid.png){kind=small}
no subject
Date: 2003-03-19 01:53 pm (UTC)Speaking of beta, since you asked once, I'll warn you that my net access is marginal at the moment and will continue to be so for a week or two. But if you send me anything (including this) I'll endeavor to be reasonably fast.
*smiles*
Date: 2003-03-19 07:38 pm (UTC)If you want to do this one. It's actually not done, I just wanted to write them out as slightly changed, older. If you're interested I'll send it to you tonight.
I don't know what it is with my current Ron/Draco fixation...
~Icarus
Whoops
Date: 2003-03-19 07:39 pm (UTC)~Icarus
thumbs up
Date: 2003-03-20 05:05 am (UTC)Two things: one, it's nice to see someone not be 'quuite impressive', 'spectacularly endowed,' or 'hung like a donkey'.
Two --- Merlin's arse? LOL
Oh and I don't tihnk Brits say 'heck', but that's minor.
brodie
oh and this might make you happy:
http://www.theonion.com/onion3910/gulf_war_2.html