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icarusHALP. How does one avoid a very, very nice guy?
See, I usually go for these shy types who don't know how to pursue women.
That puts all the work on me. If I don't feel like pursuing them, I am not pursued.
But I met this great guy up at retreat. He's a friend of a friend, at the same level (approximately) of Buddhist practice I am (not that it matters, but it means he's serious about it).
We clicked. Talked for hours one night (time I couldn't afford out of the retreat and I had to do some serious make-up work).
I'm just ... I don't want a relationship right now. I did a couple of boyfriends post-WG and I'm not into it at the moment. For a lot of reasons, one of them being that I'm just too fucking busy.
But he's Not!ShyTM. He's following up on conversations. Talking to my mom when he has a chance. Coming over to say hello at Buddhist events. Dropping me an email. Doing all the smart things GuysWhoAreInterested who are GoodAtRelationships and know how to SuccessfullyPursueAWoman do.
I'm not used to this. In fact, I've never encountered this before in my life.
What does one do?
ETA: Fandom, I'm still here. Just orbiting at a very great distance.
ETA2: Aack! He knows HowToStartConversations! That are NotAwkward! About ThingsShe'sInterestedIn that SheMentioned so that it's AlmostImpossibleNotToAnswer. Good lord. Social skills! What does one do?
See, I usually go for these shy types who don't know how to pursue women.
That puts all the work on me. If I don't feel like pursuing them, I am not pursued.
But I met this great guy up at retreat. He's a friend of a friend, at the same level (approximately) of Buddhist practice I am (not that it matters, but it means he's serious about it).
We clicked. Talked for hours one night (time I couldn't afford out of the retreat and I had to do some serious make-up work).
I'm just ... I don't want a relationship right now. I did a couple of boyfriends post-WG and I'm not into it at the moment. For a lot of reasons, one of them being that I'm just too fucking busy.
But he's Not!ShyTM. He's following up on conversations. Talking to my mom when he has a chance. Coming over to say hello at Buddhist events. Dropping me an email. Doing all the smart things GuysWhoAreInterested who are GoodAtRelationships and know how to SuccessfullyPursueAWoman do.
I'm not used to this. In fact, I've never encountered this before in my life.
What does one do?
ETA: Fandom, I'm still here. Just orbiting at a very great distance.
ETA2: Aack! He knows HowToStartConversations! That are NotAwkward! About ThingsShe'sInterestedIn that SheMentioned so that it's AlmostImpossibleNotToAnswer. Good lord. Social skills! What does one do?
no subject
Date: 2013-08-19 10:03 am (UTC)Your indirect approach is exactly what I'm trying, letting him know, indirectly, that time-wise I'm just not available.