LJ: I am an addict.

[icarus]

I missed my morning classes today.

The all-day tutor training this weekend found me falling asleep in my chair. At one point I answered something and discovered I'd drifted off halfway through the question. So I gave an answer that was the exact opposite of what I meant and... oh god, it was embarrassing.

I wish they'd told me it was a two-weekend training. Shit. I can't make it through another day of their telling me how disorienting it is being in a foreign country. Lived in India, Germany, yes, yes, I know. Tutored Tibetan refugees for two years, trust me, I know.

In the future I am just going to have one person do website design. That person can delegate as they see fit, and I'll just give the final nod. If someone goes off on a tear and decides to start doing the first person's job, they can work it out with their boss. I don't want to be in the middle.

I stayed up all night compiling Percy Ficathon lists for the website. I still need everyone's email for the feedback forms, not everyone used the weasleyworship template for the headers. I want to make the new deadline the 15th, and that looks like what it's gonna be. But I'm worried about the 10 or so people who haven't responded. Are they going to write anything?

I should not have gotten on chat with the Dungeons authors, I knew my resolve to be off by 9pm would crumble. But I was so tired and it was fun, I tell you, fun!

I'm taking four classes, tutoring, working on the Ficathon, coordinating the website, writing original fiction, wringing my hands over my waaaaay-behind fanfiction, tutoring ESL and waaaaay-behind on my research paper. I still have to write my Faulkner paper, finish the final edit on my magazine orig fanfic, write the sex scene for Keego Harbor, turn in my paperwork and proposal for the Service Learning, turn in my proposal for my research paper, do make up work.

wildernessguru is feeling neglected and depressed. I put him on with the Dungeons authors and he had a blast with 'the girls.' I tried to spend some quality time with him, snuggled up last night because he went in the bedroom at 8pm and just... lay there. I caught a little tear. I don't know what to do. There's so little of me left right now. I can't make him happy. I read what's going on in wikdsushi's journal and I want to... do something. And can't.

And I missed my morning classes today. I'm too wrung out and limp to care about my classes at the moment.

Comments

[tinderblast.livejournal.com]

Fighting the usual 'should I just sympathise vs. give opinion' debate ... hmmm. Opinion. You're overloaded and aren't prioritising. Second opinion: it's none of my business, especially as someone who does the same. Suggestions bursts out a la infamous chest-scene in Alien: But can't someone else take up some of the ficathon slack, at least temporarily?

-brodie

[icarusancalion.livejournal.com]

LOL! Great - and accurate - observation. It's good to hear from you, (I'm still snickering over those 20 worst songs -- heh. I wish 'Bridge Over Troubled Water' made it, personally.)

I'm prioritizing all right: everything unimportant and fun goes to the top of the list.

I am delegating madly: both the Percy Ficathon website (the delegating process became a bit of a mess), the Percy fic announcements (thank you merrycontrary!), and the repair of the Icarus Website (currently can't update it without having it hang for 20 minutes). Delegating itself takes time and involves one deeply in the less vital projects you're trying to get off your plate. *pulls out hair*

I'm getting some finished fic out there and posted to tide people over. Then I plan to have the original fic emailed shortly (cursive is doing the beta review) and that will be done. Finished. Finally. The other fic activity can wait till the weekend.

That leaves school. The most important project I've been putting off. It's huge. The tutoring is taking the most time, yet counts the least. Don't know what to do about that.

As for wildernessguru... boy. I don't know what to do. I think he needs more than just attention from me. But he's right. My LJ-time generally takes away from time with him.

Icarus

[tinderblast.livejournal.com]

I'm prioritizing all right: everything unimportant and fun goes to the top of the list.

*nods with the seasoned guilt of a long-time procrastinator*

That leaves school. The most important project I've been putting off. It's huge. The tutoring is taking the most time, yet counts the least. Don't know what to do about that.

Why is that always the way? Important = scary = left to the last minute.

I think he needs more than just attention from me. But he's right. My LJ-time generally takes away from time with him.

But - you're only going to be a student for x amount of time, not forever, and some time-juggling is to be expected. Also, your online time is your relaxation/creative time, which is important and maybe quality time in lieu of this wouldn't be all that great because you haven'y unwound and de-stressed, etc.

So maybe a little structure to your time together - the old 'date night' resolution - would work will you're in a better space, time-wise?

-brodie