Okay, she's in surgery.

[icarus]

wildernessguru's mom went into surgery at 9am this morning. *takes deep breath and holds it, yes, for four hours* *turns purple*

He's home today with fuzzhead today. WG's not Buddhist, but there's one mantra he likes, so he's doing that. Even if people aren't spiritual, there's something about having something you can do while you hope.

I'm calm, but WG is quite stressed and frightened, though he's outwardly calm. It hits you at a gut level when it's your parents. All your life, from the time you were tiny, you depend on them. You might not even get along later, but they're the center of your life in many ways. When something happens to them -- you're not ready for it. You can't be ready for it. It hits you at a visceral level that's surprising. In WG's case, he and his mom have always been close, and he has the extra weight of guilt because he's missed the last few Christmas's.

She's going to be all right I think, but that doesn't make this waiting any easier for him.

I do hope I didn't offend anyone with my last Snape-post (and hopefully it's clear that I think 's essay is fascinating and insightful). Because she's brilliant.

It's just rather intense at home at the moment.

P.S. There will probably be a lot of Buddhist stuff in my journal for a while. It's not prostyletizing, just a major part of my life (my whole family's practicing Buddhists). I'm pretty serious about it. I've stood outside the capital building with Richard Gere protesting China's occupation of Tibet; have done more retreats than I can easily count; have been in private teachings with the H. H. the Dalai Lama on several occasions, before people really knew who he was; have studied Vinaya, Abhidharma, Madhyamika, Vajrayana, etc., and some teachers have even wasted Mahamudra teachings on me; have constructed monasteries, donated thousands of dollars, learned some Tibetan... okay, you get the picture. I left my last fandom largely because of the conservative (re: obnoxious) Christian element in the Tolkien crowd.

I believe that most spiritual people (Buddhist and Christian) think they're more spiritual than they are -- that is to say, they believe their path is largely about what other people ought to be doing and spend their time selling their beliefs to others and judging what others do or don't do. Which usually means that regular, kind people who don't do that crap are way ahead. So. I hang out mostly with the non-religious because I like them more. *laughs*

Comments

[melpemone.livejournal.com]

::completely inadequate but heartfelt hugs to you all:: I suspect you're doing a lot for wildernessguru just by being there, presumptuous as that is for me to say. Hang in there - you're all in my thoughts.

And you don't need to explain away your Buddhist stuff, either - I personally happen to find it fascinating, and I look forward to those posts. :)

[icarusancalion.livejournal.com]

Thank you. I hope to be home soon, as I have no idea how the surgery went (it should have been completed, oh, 15 minutes ago).

I'm in a tangle (as usual) with the ULTRA-Christians in the LotR fandom again, so I'm feeling rather defensive. I just seem to help tweaking them about slash every time they open to door for the discussion. It's just... in the Tolkien world, Tolkien is canon. Not the fucking bible, regardless of Tolkien's religious orientation.

*tears out hair*

*stomps on rabid Christian Tolkien their-rendition-of-Tolkien fans (and it's remarkable how similar their Tolkien's views are to their own, eh?)*

Icarus

[melpemone.livejournal.com]

(and it's remarkable how similar their Tolkien's views are to their own, eh?)

Ain't it always the way? ::sigh:: Wish I could help - conservative religious always irk me, and I'm a pretty good debater (too many years in a religion debate chatroom will at least give you that), but my Tolkien knowledge is non-existent. :)