O Christmas Tree! O Christmas Treeee!

[icarus]

O Christmas Tree! O Christmas Treeee!

This is the worst it's ever been. We bought our Christmas tree on December 20th, 2005.

It is now April 11th, 2006, and the bloody thing is still sitting -- dead, sans ornaments -- in our living room. wildernessguru wants to burn it. He burns the Christmas tree every year, but he's never been this late.

I have been begging, pleading, that he get rid of the damned tree.

We've reached the point where we have to sneak it out of the apartment at night so the neighbors won't know. Personally, I don't care, I'm ready to throw it out the window. But WG cares what people think so now, now it's a production.

I'm afraid we (and by 'we' I mean 'he') will have to dress in cammo decorated with hedge trimmings to sneak the tree out the back.

I'm going to be posting daily humiliating updates until the tree is finally gone.

Comments

[wicked-socks.livejournal.com]

My uncle tends to keep christmas trees for years... I am very serious here. The last one he kept for 3 and the one before that for FIVE BLOODY YEARS! He just leaves it up, plugs it in when he feels festive, and constantly expounds upon the efficienty of never having to take it down. Somehow he was psychologically opposed to removing the tree while a single needle still remained. I have no idea how his house didn't burn down because these were live trees (perhaps I should say very dead trees). He's now replaced it with a fibroptic monstrosity that is at least flame retardent.


But you know what makes this worse? He sells christmas trees every year with the charity organization he works with. So it's not like he didn't have any place to get a replacement tree.

[icarusancalion.livejournal.com]

One word: bachelor.

Icarus

[wicked-socks.livejournal.com]

.... try been married for over twenty years.

[icarusancalion.livejournal.com]

Oh Good Lord. That poor woman.

Reminds me of the eccentric geologist who went to a "garage sale" for the Air and Space Museum in Washington D.C. She knew nothing about what he bought until the truck pulled up to their house and started unloading a dentist's chair, space suits... the delivery guys asked her:

"So. Where do you want it?"

Icarus

[wicked-socks.livejournal.com]

I will never understand why she hasn't choked him in his sleep at times.

Haha that's great. Sounds like something my father would do. He was always trying to sneak stuff he'd bought at an auction into the house. His clever and elaborate plans to fool my mother always failed.

I still have a stuffed fox on the porch. It was one of his finds. I scare kids with it at halloween. Then there are the cavalry swords, antique instruments none of us could play, and etc. We also had a dentist's chair at one point.

But I can't say anything we have beats a space suit. But I suppose full Hungarian Husszar dress might come close.



.... It may be my father's genes speaking, but I'd buy a space suit.