Writing a Good Fuck

[icarus]

Thought I'd be blunt there. Sorry to those of you who are reading this at work. I'm eating over my keyboard right now, so I'm going to make this brief.

#1 - tighten up that POV!
Sex is intimate, therefore, you really need to be clear on your POV, there needs to be immediacy. Don't lapse into sweeping epic narrative voice here! You'd be surprised at how many people get scared of 'not doing this right' and start writing their sex scenes in a very distant voice the moment things get hot and heavy.

As soon as you use the word 'they', take a close look at why. That's not a rule, but it is a red flag.

Oh, and please, to invoke Minotaur, beware depersonalising: not 'the hard cock' but 'his hard cock', not 'a hand' but 'her hand.' They are attached. Think about it. If you're in bed with someone you care about, and they squeeze your arse, to you really think 'a hand' did this? *shudders* Scary thought. No. He did.

#2 - involve all the senses
Other areas of our fic can be caught in mental processing, but sex involves...

touch...
soft skin, callused hands catching on fine fabric...

smell...
he smelled of soap, and the grass clippings that were still caught in his hair...*

close up visuals...
sweat stuck his hair to his forehead...

taste...
he tasted like cinnamon, and the faint buzz of something he'd taken...*

sound...
sheets whispered and rustled... a shoe dropped with a loud clunk and they froze...

*Note: do please have a good explanation for the taste/smell established - (thanks fee_absinthe, and tinderblast) - he tasted like apple... the half-eaten apple dropped to the ground between them, ignored.

#3 - remember your environment!
The experience of the envionment plays a Huge role. Each setting has its own quirks. This enriches the experience your reader has.

Ever had sex in the outdoors?
Then you know the person on top gets cold and you tend to want to be on the bottom. Heh. Where it's warm. And there are hazards, bugs, sticks and leaves. On the plus side is the feeling of open space and wind, and all the sounds and sights around you.

In front of a fireplace?
One side of you gets overly hot, the other side cool, if you're very close to it. And oooo, to touch your lover when they've been baked like that.

In a nice soft bed?
The sheets get tangled, get in the way, and there's often a squeak, or the headboard knocks against the wall in a way that informs your roommate. Ooops.

In the water?
Like hell you have, not anal anyway. All lubricant washes off. Great fantasy though. 'Tis a great place for blowjobs, however.

So that's good for a start.

More sex tonight!

Comments

[lemone.livejournal.com]

"Sex is intimate, therefore, you really need to be clear on your POV, there needs to be immediacy. Don't lapse into sweeping epic narrative voice here! You'd be surprised at how many people get scared of 'not doing this right' and start writing their sex scenes in a very distant voice the moment things get hot and heavy. "
Yeah hi, I sort of wandered in from a link to this posted in someone else's journal, and I really agreed with this part especially. The sex scene can't be long winded or the reader will be tempted to skim through it, but if it's too short then it'll sound rushed and totally unsexy.

I really enjoyed reading this, you brought up a lot of valid points in a frank and knowlegeable manner. Excellent!

[icarusancalion.livejournal.com]

Actually, I wasn't referring to length. I was referring to how close the 'camera' is to the action. (I've actually written 65 pages of sex. Flat out. Length doesn't matter.)

An example of sweeping narrative voice would be:

"Then they fell into each other's arms, kissing."

Your eye is very far from the action, you see?

"His breath was a soft pant on Harry's shoulder, and somehow Harry's hand was caught in his shirt. Ooops. But before Harry could say anything or apologize, warm lips parted under his and suddenly none of that mattered."

Which is hotter? The close-up of course. The one that's written very much from Harry's point of view and describes his experience intimately, even describing his thoughts and physical sensations as if you are there.

The writers call this level of distance or closeness to the action 'penetration.' (Heh. They didn't mean sex scenes in this context, but it applies.)

I aim to please.

I'm working slowly towards my goal of 14 NC-17 stories on RS.org by the end of the year. Nine so far (once 'Skinny Dipping' goes up).

Hmm. I've written 22 sex scenes in all of my stories (including 2 Frodo/Sam sex scenes), both R and NC-17 rated. Though 'Sex, Drugs and Death Eater Rock' had a disproportionate amount, I think about four sex scenes in that one story?

Thus far I don't think I've repeated anything, it's run the gamut from the rough, passionate Percy/Snape in 'Sweet Hypocrisy' to the gentle and sweet Harry/Ron in 'Hagrid's Hut'.

~Icarus

[lemone.livejournal.com]

Whoops, my bad. S'what I get for posting while in a coma, I guess.

[icarusancalion.livejournal.com]

*rereads*

Damn. I do get on my soapbox and preach, don't I?

LOL

~Icarus