This sounds like fun!

[icarus]

Gacked from wikdsushi and resonant8.

Ask any character from any of my stories a question, and they will answer:

Harry and Percy in 'Skinny Dipping' - do you want to know what they think of their new relationship? Or what about Ron's opinion of the whole affair?

Ron and Draco in 'Beg Me For It' & 'Sex, Drugs and Death Eater Rock' - do you want to know what Draco thinks Ron does for a living? Percy's opinion of what he saw that night?

Do you dare to ask Snape a question from 'Primer to the Dark Arts'?

Ron and Percy about 'Not My Affair'? Ooo. Did Fred and George ever figure it out?

Comments

[wikdsushi.livejournal.com]

Ron: What did you think of the way Harry and Percy were behaving when you got back from the house with the towel? No, really, what did you think? *eg*

Harry and Percy: So, you boys ever find any proper lube? *wiggles eyebrows*

Ron's response

[icarusancalion.livejournal.com]

Ron: Look, I've been hearing this shit about Percy for as long as I can remember. Now he may be Percy, but he's also my brother. All right, all right, so he's a little prissy sometimes and he can act a bit -- you know. But that doesn't mean he's like - like that. I mean, he had a girlfriend once, right? Even if he does stare at Harry (everybody stares at Harry -- he's famous!) or Lee or some of the blokes in the neighborhood and then looks away all embarrassed. He's just... shy... that's all. Okay, he's never been shy really, but he's a little stiff (oh, ouch, bad image) around people... um, er...

...oh god, not Harry, please? I can handle anything but that. Not that it meant a thing -- it could have been perfectly innocent. They could have, uh, fallen onto each other... standing up in the water... or! maybe they were wrestling... standing there perfectly still, staring at each other...

I don't wanna know I don't wanna know I don't wanna know.

Still, Harry and I sprang apart just like that earlier and I'm sure it looked just as dodgy if not worse. And when Harry's bed was empty later, it wasn't like was up in Percy's room. I checked! Of course Percy was gone, too...

AUGH! Look let's not talk about this, all right? I mean, this is my brother you're talking about, not to mention my best friend. Some things just sort themselves on their own.

Icarus

[icarusancalion.livejournal.com]

Harry bursts out laughing.

Percy (shocked): That's none of your business!

Harry continues to laugh.

Percy: It's not funny, Harry. (He sits up straight, chin high.) I think all your readers should understand that pond scum --

Harry: It wasn't pond scum! It was the coating on the bottom of a lily pad!

Percy (continues relentlessly): -- pond scum is unsanitary, rife with bacteria, both Muggle and magical, and is likely to carry the eggs of Nargles and other common household pests...

Harry: It does not.

Percy: ... and under no circumstances do I recommend its use for - for anything.

Sushi: So, does that mean you found something else?

Harry rolls his eyes at Percy and nods emphatically.

Percy: Harry! (He pulls Harry close and whispers under his breath. Fortunately, our reporter has excellent hearing.) At least one of us has worked for the Ministry and knows how to handle the press! They're not really asking about the lube, they're trying to trick us into admitting we're still sleeping together. Just be vague and say things with which no one can disagree.

Harry: I really don't care, Percy.

Percy: Well, I have a career to consider and a scandal with The Boy Who Lived --

Harry: Don't call me that.

Percy: -- is not one of my long-term goals. And I won't call you that if you stop acting like an ass. (Percy extends his hand to the reporter, with a false smile.) Thank you very much for your time, it has been lovely chatting with you. My mother insists that you try her lemonade, which is excellent by-the-way...

The disappointed reporter picks up her notebook and briefcase and follows him into the kitchen.

Out at the car, she is surprised to find Harry waiting for her.

Harry: The answer is yes.

Sushi: Pardon?

Harry: We did find a better lubricant. Percy insists on nothing but the best. He actually has very good taste, and he's going to be picking out everything, since I don't care what colour is next to what, and as for how the furniture is arranged.. well, so long as the place has four walls, a roof and a door, I don't see why it matters.

Reporter blinks at him.

Harry explains: At some point Percy has to understand that image isn't everything. Be sure to spell his name right though, it really pisses him off when people get it wrong. Would probably make him madder than your article. (Harry gives her a winning smile.) Now, I've gotta run. Better talk to Ron...

Icarus

[sociofemme.livejournal.com]

Harry, Percy: Are you ever going to tell Ron/twins/anyone what is up with the lilies? Or is it more fun to torture them?

Ron: Which is worse, the curiosity about the lily thing between Harry and Percy, or knowing that your best friend shagged your most uptight, anal, annoying brother?

=D

[icarusancalion.livejournal.com]

Percy (scratches his head with a philosophical expression, takes his glasses off and wipes them.): You know, this is the longest time I've ever kept secret from those two, and I - I'm just wondering if they're ever going to figure it out.

Harry: They will. And I hope I'm there to see the look on their faces.

~*~*~

Ron: He did What?!
Harry (blushes furiously): Well, Ron, um...
Ron (with an emphatic gesture): No. Don't answer that, I don't want to know.

[isiscolo.livejournal.com]

Terry: what do you really think about Harry, now? And about Snape?

[icarusancalion.livejournal.com]

Well, Harry's always been good to me. (laughs) Whether he knows it or not! So I don't begrudge him anything. And frankly, while Severus is great in bed -- he's a controlling, manipulative busybody. Yes, yes, I know, he meant well, and he did help in the end but -- god. Harry can have him. Though, true, I do owe him a lot. Guess I owe both of them in a way. But I had my chance to pay them back. (Terry leans forward eagerly.) You see, this reporter came sniffing around a few weeks ago... (http://www.livejournal.com/users/icarusancalion/70220.html#cutid1)

It was fun. (Terry smirks.) There's something to be said for being underestimated every, single time.

Icarus

[tinderblast.livejournal.com]

Oh, too much opportunity, too many questions to ask ...

Hmm. A Moment of Sin Snape: what glamour would you secretly use in a one night stand situation? And where do you see the situation going with Terry?

Primer Harry: what do you think about Snape's ex-partner, really?

brodie

[icarusancalion.livejournal.com]

If one uses any sort of Glamour for a one-night stand, you can count on it being a one-minute stand, as they do not withstand physical contact. Review your basic Charms textbook, year Six, if you don't recall. What house were you from? Perhaps I can take points retroactively.

As for where the situation is going with young Mr. Terry Boot... I certainly don't need Sybil to tell you tell that.

In all likelihood that young lemming is going to waste a great deal of my time, whinge and complain every moment that I spend saving his wretched Ravenclaw neck, and never show an ounce of gratitude. Like all the rest of them. The one single benefit is that, given his profession, at least there is an outlet for the... frustration... he's caused. That grinning little irritant owes me and I fully intend to collect.

[tinderblast.livejournal.com]

Yes, sir. Sorry, sir.

*hangs head in shame and guilt*

I suppose you'll be forced to cane me now that I want to know who your top three polyjuiced partners would be, with young Mr. Boot as the willing accomplice?

brodie

[icarusancalion.livejournal.com]

Primer Harry whispers with author, who shakes her head. Um. I'm afraid you'll have to wait for the next story. But I promise, we'll get to that. Really.

[millefiori.livejournal.com]

So (Sex, Drugs, etc) Percy, what was your opinion of that memorable night?

[icarusancalion.livejournal.com]

Percy: It's a bad sign when you don't even need to ask 'which night', isn't it?

Well, other than the fact that Ron has never apologised, nor has he even offered to replace the chocolates (not that I would take him up on it of course but it would be polite)... dear God, what a question.

*sighs heavily*

If I were completely honest, in retrospect, I would say: jealous. I knew Ron and Draco were getting rather close but I never figured Ron for.. well. You know.

No, don't misunderstand me. I'm not interested in boys or men - and I'm certainly not interested in Draco Malfoy, who has all of his father's worst qualities and none of his good ones. But I did all the work in setting up Draco's rescue; it was my idea to see if there was some punishment the Dark Lord would accept in lieu of his death; I convinced Lucius to use Ron, knowing that this was such an enormous favour it would cover a lot of Ron's 'sins.' He has no idea how close he treads to the edge sometimes... he terrifies me with that bad attitude, like the Death Eaters are going to put up with him forever.

No, I don't regret an iota and I would do it all again, in a heartbeat.

But... sometimes... it seems as though I work so hard, and I don't seem to get anywhere. And there's always someone right next to me who gets exactly what they want, dropped right into their hands without even trying. Ron gets a friend and a - a partner. Just like that. Here. It seems unfair. It would be nice if, just once say, an attractive woman were moved into my flat?

See? It's childish and unworthy, I know. But there it is.

I know I'm a bit late to ask but here we go!

[thywillbedone.livejournal.com]

BMFI Ron: How much are you willing to sacrifice for Malfoy? Cause we all know he's not just a f*** buddy, no matter what you and he say...

BMFI Draco: Admit it, Weasley's gotten close. But how close? When all this is over, would you dare walk away from Ron?

Hey you Percy: What do you really think about Lucius? Cause it just sounds like you're too close sometimes...

ReunionDraco: Why did you think Ron would agree to have your baby? Why were you so confident he would? And will you ever share the horrors of what he's about to go through?!

ReunionRon: Why did you agree to have Draco's child?

NotMyAffair Ron: Would you do it again if you had the chance?

NotMyAffair Percy: Same question as Ron.

What the hell Neville: Did it really turn you on to listen?

Primer Harry and Ron: Are you sure that the sex between you was because of the potion or is there some unspoken feelings between you? The scene in Hagrid's Hut was HOT

Guy talk Ron: Did you really go the next day without underwear like Harry asked?

Unexpected Guest Harry, Ron & Snape: You know, too bad it was all Harry's dream...but, if it could happen for real, would you all three do this?

What fun!

[icarusancalion.livejournal.com]

Unexpected Guest Harry, Ron & Snape: You know, too bad it was all Harry's dream...but, if it could happen for real, would you all three do this?

Snape: I cannot imagine being in the same bed as a Weasley.

Harry: (aside) I think I could talk him into it.

Ron: WHAT?! No way!

Harry: That would be the sticking point. Ron... c'mon.

Ron in Guy Talk

[icarusancalion.livejournal.com]

Guy talk Ron: Did you really go the next day without underwear like Harry asked?

Heh. Yeah, I sure did. Of course, it helps that I'd do without underwear every day if I could get away with it -- I do at home, just not at school. Harry of course knows that. You might say he learned it the 'hard' way. *salacious grin*

Anyway, you'd think he'd ask me to do without underwear, like that one time -- *clears throat* -- at the Burrow, and that would be it. No sir. He spent the entire day teasing me! Bumping into me, making comments that could really be taken the wrong way, running the feather end of his quill over his mouth... *groans* I had to step out of class to 'go to the loo' at least twice! And every time I came back, Harry was laughing.

The things I put up with, I tell you. *grins*

Beg Me For It Percy

[icarusancalion.livejournal.com]

Hey you Percy: What do you really think about Lucius? Cause it just sounds like you're too close sometimes...

Too close? I don't understand what you mean by that.

I've a very close working relationship with Mr. Malfoy. You could almost describe it as symbiotic -- it's almost like the perfect working machine. He trusts me a great deal. I mean, not only with the day-to-day running of the Ministry (which is really carried out by me), but he trusts me to manage some very complicated political scenarios where one false word could mean the death of us all. And at one point, he even trusted me with the life of his son.

Actually, that's where it all began. Before then, I was just an ordinary assistant. But when I handled that touchy situation so delicately, he began to give me a great deal more responsibility.

I guess he recognized my capabilities. Which is a damned sight better than anyone else I've ever worked for at that Ministry, let me tell you.

Strange, isn't it, that I've more responsibility under the Death Eaters, that I've gone higher, faster than I ever have under the legitimate government.

I wonder why that is.

Not My Affair

[icarusancalion.livejournal.com]

NotMyAffair Ron: Would you do it again if you had the chance?

Are you crazy??! I got fucked by my bloody brother! I can't believe it! I'd get a memory charm if there weren't a risk of erasing something important along with it -- and I'd insist on him getting one, too. But then I'd have to insist on one for Bill, and he'd never do it and probably lecture me on the importance of lessons learned, life experience, all that 'big brother' rubbish.

I don't want Percy seeing me like that, I don't like that knowing look in his eye -- like he knows what just what I'll try under what circumstances. And what I look like doing it! I don't want to think of him like that, either.

And now I have to act properly shocked when Percy finally comes out of the closet, enough to fool Fred and George. That's gonna be a job. I'm practicing in the mirror. It's the one moment it could all come apart.

Looking back, if I had to get drunk at the office party, I wish I'd worked a little harder at it. Then maybe I wouldn't remember everything as clear as day.


NotMyAffair Percy: Same question as Ron.

Do it all over again?

Which part do you mean? The humiliating morning where Ron wouldn't even talk to me, the whispered angry conversations at the office, or the three uncomfortable weeks where we saw each other at work and couldn't stand it? Or maybe that wonderful moment when I realized that Ron had told -- and he'd promised not to! If it ever got out... *sighs* At least it was Bill.

All right, I admit, it was a wonderful night. I've never had anyone like me so quickly and it was so... playful and fun. We laughed a lot. Joked about his never having done this before.

If only it hadn't turned out to be Ron. I would have looked him up again for certain.

I'll just have to be more careful in the future.

Neville - 'Oh, What the Hell'

[icarusancalion.livejournal.com]

What the hell Neville: Did it really turn you on to listen?

Neville cringes.

Do you promise not to tell anyone? Okay. Yeah - god. It did, and that's really weird, isn't it? (He leans forward.) I mean, what if that means I'm.. you know? Not that I've ever looked at Harry, or anyone, like that but... I could tell exactly what they were doing!

I only hope Dean had the same, um, reaction. Not that I'm ever going to ask. This one is staying between me and you, okay? I get teased enough now. If Seamus ever heard...

Neville shakes his head.

If I am, um, like that, I'm sure I'll know soon enough. Right?

Primer Harry

[icarusancalion.livejournal.com]

Primer Harry and Ron: Are you sure that the sex between you was because of the potion or is there some unspoken feelings between you? The scene in Hagrid's Hut was HOT.

I don't think I actually said it was because of the potion. In fact, I was pretty careful about what I said:

'I feel exactly the same as I always have.'

I just wanted my best friend back. Me and Ron, we've been through a lot together. He's stood by me in some very tough times, okay? If he wants to think it means it was all about the potion... well, that's all right with me. If he wants to see something more in that, well, that's fine, too. You see? Something I learned from being with Severus... and watching Dumbledore, too, come to think of it. You don't have to say what you mean exactly.

Primer Ron

[icarusancalion.livejournal.com]

Primer Harry and Ron: Are you sure that the sex between you was because of the potion or is there some unspoken feelings between you? The scene in Hagrid's Hut was HOT.

Uh. Yeah. It was -- but that doesn't mean I'm...

Never mind. It's all behind us now. Everything's fine. *swallows* Except for Harry being with Snape, now that's a major problem, I mean if were anyone but Snape. *Ron shakes his head.* Harry must be really hard up.

Reunion Draco

[icarusancalion.livejournal.com]

ReunionDraco: Why did you think Ron would agree to have your baby? Why were you so confident he would? And will you ever share the horrors of what he's about to go through?!

Draco smiles.

You get to know a person when you live with them for a while, and Ron hasn't changed that much. Other than the extra weight which he really needs to do something about if he plans to keep me. Besides, you should see the shit-hole he was living in! I figured he needed a break. Anything to get him out of there. Not to mention the slap in the face to his ex. I'm going to enjoy that almost as much as Ron -- and I haven't even met her.

You see, women are really strange about male pregnancy. Oh, in theory they like it. But for all the times they've said 'Why don't you carry the baby?' or 'I'd like to see you go through labor!' when confronted with the reality... it's like you've trespassed on their private 'woman only' temple. They really hate it!

As for horrors? What horrors? It's my understanding that pregnancy is different for everyone, and there's no predicting what will happen. *clears throat* Why get Ron worked up over something that might not even happen?

Reunion Ron

[icarusancalion.livejournal.com]

ReunionRon: Why did you agree to have Draco's child?

I was a little bored. And, wow, my life had gone to shit, right? I figured I could use nine months off, to think things over.

*shrugs* How hard can it be?

BMFI Ron

[icarusancalion.livejournal.com]

BMFI Ron: How much are you willing to sacrifice for Malfoy? Cause we all know he's not just a f*** buddy, no matter what you and he say...

Huh. As if putting on a dress didn't answer that question already...

Look, don't tell him, all right? Because he's insufferable enough as it is.

(Runs hand through his hair.) I never planned this. Okay? We were just going to bump off Malfoy, and if some 'stuff' happened along the way -- well, all right then.

Now... well, we still have a job to do. I can't hold him back from that. Dammit, I just don't want to think about it, okay? Chances are neither one of is gonna make it, all right?

Re: I know I'm a bit late to ask but here we go!

[icarusancalion.livejournal.com]

BMFI Draco: Admit it, Weasley's gotten close. But how close? When all this is over, would you dare walk away from Ron?

Look. I hate to break any of your romantic notions, but we have a pretty tall order in front of us. Tally up the odds a bit. Two 19-year-old wizards, one prissy little pasty-faced prick with a permanent stick up his behind. One wand. One insane plan. That's in our corner.

In the other corner, there's about six human Death Eater guards and a dozen or more trolls. All fully armed. One seriously evil Dark Wizard, dozens of wards and back-up spells, and if I know him at all (which I do) there are traps within traps.

On top of that you have Dumbledore's forces who have their own plan, and Ron's warned me to recall that they don't even know what side we're on.

How do you rate our chances?

Yeah. So of course we're 'enjoying' our time together as much as possible. Who wouldn't?