icarus: Snape by mysterious artist (Percy Pardon?)
[personal profile] icarus
[livejournal.com profile] ygrane mentioned a particular Squicky pairing. Ah. I couldn't resist.



"Well, you realise Mister Weasley, that traditionally the 'Head Boy' apprentices to one of the staff members; and that said apprenticeship can take many forms?"

Percy swallowed. Oh, he'd read up on this. And read between the lines. "Yes, sir."

Professor Dumbledore nodded thoughtfully, and folded his hands as he leaned back in his chair. "You are accorded the right, of course, to choose the person to whom you will be apprenticed. We have many younger professors here who are very knowledgeable and... skilled... in those certain 'additional' areas of advanced magic, who might also be appealing to a young man your age."

Percy had already decided however. Only the best would do.

"I would be apprenticed to you, Professor Dumbledore." He glanced up as a shocked expression crossed the Headmaster's face. "Um. If that's all right?"

Dumbledore merely blinked behind his spectacles. "Why, yes. Ahem. Yes, that's... fine. If rather unexpected."

How bad could it be after all? Percy mentally congratulated himself on getting out of the more onerous duties of being Head Boy. Obviously Professor Dumbledore was far too old to --

"I will need to see Professor Snape about a particular potion, however." He twinkled at Percy apologetically. "At my age I'm fear it is a bit of a necessity. Not to worry though, Mister Weasley, I should be 'up for the job' as it were."

Date: 2003-12-28 02:08 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] mark356.livejournal.com
......

*speechless*

*scrubs brain*

That said, I love how naive your Percy is; he's thought about the policies, but apparantly hasn't considered all of the possibilities! I think you could write out more, but I don't know if that would be a good thing.

*wibbles in corner*

Date: 2003-12-28 02:21 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] icarusancalion.livejournal.com
It would be a bad thing. A very, very bad thing. Oh, dear. The images conjured up.

Icarus

Date: 2003-12-28 02:55 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] lizardspots.livejournal.com
Ack. Ack ack ack. ::claws out eyes:: Jeez, that was... interesting. :D

Date: 2003-12-28 03:11 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] icarusancalion.livejournal.com
How much you wanna bet Dumbledore caught on to Percy's clever little plan?

Icarus

Date: 2003-12-28 03:20 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] lizardspots.livejournal.com
Well of course he did, and he had no intention of letting Percy get away with it. :D

Date: 2003-12-28 05:46 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] emeraldjay.livejournal.com
*scream* My eyes! My eyes! I think I've gone blind. That was a very scary image to wake up to. Now I have to go hurt someone to feel better.

The only thing more squicky would be Dominatrix!McGonagal in leather thigh-high boots, a leather bustier, holding a cat-o-nine-tails, and sub!Percy wearing a slave harness and spiked collar and leash.

There, take that, Icarus. (-:

Date: 2003-12-28 10:52 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] icarusancalion.livejournal.com
Frighteningly, I actually like that image (minus the spiked collar because they're ugly).

Need to hurt someone? Here. Have a house-elf. *boot*

Icarus

Date: 2003-12-28 06:44 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] anuanu.livejournal.com
*squeak*

You wrote that well. Really, really, reeeeallly well. Scary well.

Percy/Dumbledore...*covers eyes*

You're so awesome hon. Squick or no. *bows and rolls on floor at your feet*

Date: 2003-12-28 01:36 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] icarusancalion.livejournal.com
Well, just for you I will continue this story.

*The universe echoes with a resounding, *

Er. Maybe not.

Icarus

Date: 2003-12-28 02:38 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] anuanu.livejournal.com
Er...

I was trying to give you good fb, the kind I'd like to have. Do unto others, and all that, you know.

I said you wrote it well - not that I'd like to see Dumbeldore and Percy get it on.

Ick. *takes swig of mouthwash, passes it on*

Date: 2003-12-28 02:46 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] icarusancalion.livejournal.com
No, that was a thank you, really. I just couldn't resist the wisecrack. ;)

Tee-heehee

Icaru

Date: 2003-12-28 08:04 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] peachfuzz123.livejournal.com
I absolutely LOVE your stories. I love them. Can't tell you how much I love them. :) They're brilliant, YOU are brilliant. :-D

Date: 2003-12-28 01:38 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] icarusancalion.livejournal.com
Percy blinks at Peachfuss, stupified. "You can't be serious. Do you realise what I will have to - to do?" He slumps down with his in his hands. "I should have said Professor Snape...."

Icarus

Date: 2003-12-28 09:50 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] thistle-chaser.livejournal.com
Ew ew ew! Old man penis smell... before breakfast even! Ew! I'm going back to bed.

:)

Date: 2003-12-28 10:18 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] anjenue.livejournal.com
EW!

I think I'm more squicked by this comment than by the story itself!

Me, too, and that fic was an ice water shower

Date: 2003-12-28 11:15 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] rfachir.livejournal.com
I may have to write some quantum theory. Or become a hermit. I don't think sex will ever have the appeal it did now that I've had my eyes and nose shocked by Dominatrix!McGonnigle, a spike-collared stinky Headmaster with twinkling eyes, and slave-boy Percy.
From: [identity profile] icarusancalion.livejournal.com
I was still squicked until we got to the phrase 'slave!boy Percy.' Then, somehow, that perked me right up. :D

Icarus

Date: 2003-12-28 01:39 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] icarusancalion.livejournal.com
I have to say that the comment deserves some sort of squick award.

I love your icon, by the way.


Icarus

Date: 2003-12-28 01:33 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] icarusancalion.livejournal.com
Old man penis smell

All right, I think I just lost my breakfast. Percy's looking a little green, too. :D

Icarus

Date: 2003-12-28 02:34 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] thistle-chaser.livejournal.com
Heeheehee. Sorry!

;)

Date: 2003-12-28 12:33 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] dream-caster.livejournal.com
I couldn't comment earlier when I orginally saw this post, but now that I have time to.

THAT WAS SOOOOO WRONG.

*howls with laughter*

I think I stared stupidified at the screen for five minutes before my brian processed that yes you actually did write it Then I started laughing. Poor naive Percy.

Terra

Date: 2003-12-28 01:47 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] icarusancalion.livejournal.com
Oh god. I even have the follow-up in mind.

Icarus

Date: 2003-12-28 08:50 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] harveywallbang.livejournal.com
ew icarus...ew...

Date: 2003-12-31 06:02 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] icarusancalion.livejournal.com
I couldn't help it....

Icarus

Date: 2003-12-31 11:01 pm (UTC)

I love you!

Date: 2003-12-28 09:25 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] dphearson.livejournal.com
Muhahaha!

Can you hear laughing from Portland?

Oh, God! Poor Percy!

And yet, you could make it...no never mind

*dies laughing*

Re: I love you!

Date: 2003-12-31 06:04 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] icarusancalion.livejournal.com
I really debated that last line... and then couldn't resist. Percy's gonna be wishing he'd asked for Snape, let me tell you.

Icarus

Date: 2003-12-29 09:07 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] wanderingscribe.livejournal.com
.....

[gags on mouthful of popcorn]

Oh, Percy. You sweetly, naive boy. Should have known that viagra was invented by wizards, after all...

Icarus, if you even *THINK* of writing this...I'll...I'll...I'll sic more Sirius/Ron bunnies on you!

Date: 2003-12-29 09:17 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] wanderingscribe.livejournal.com
Oh, btw...I found a link to some Ron/Draco fanart for you. Though, your evil deeds don't merit a gift...

Hell, I'll do it anyway. Here: http://www.livejournal.com/community/yaoi/936768.html?#cutid1

[plops down link and runs]

Date: 2003-12-31 06:04 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] icarusancalion.livejournal.com
Pretty, pretty. And I bow my head in shame (as I attempt to hide the smirk).

Icarus

Date: 2003-12-29 02:10 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] bella-the-dark.livejournal.com
It was like watching a train wreck, you know it's going to happen, but you can't stop watching (in this case reading). But it was well written.

Date: 2003-12-31 06:05 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] icarusancalion.livejournal.com
I am truly, truly appalled at myself. (Icarus says smugly.)

Icarus

Date: 2003-12-30 02:51 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] caputdraconis77.livejournal.com
Om my, I guess that's not what Percy intended now, is it? *smirks viciously* Sex with Dumbledore...yuck, major sqick alarm :D

Date: 2003-12-31 06:06 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] icarusancalion.livejournal.com
Sometimes Percy is just too clever for his own good. No doubt Dumbledore had him all figured out in an instant. *twinkles*

Icarus

Date: 2003-12-30 05:44 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] npetrenko.livejournal.com
That was great. Nice job!

Date: 2003-12-31 06:10 pm (UTC)

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