Vacuuming in five easy steps

[icarus]

wildernessguru's guide to vacuuming in five easy steps:

1 - Pull vacuum cleaner out from closet
2 - Clear floor
3 - Close drapes
4 - Strip naked
5 - Vacuum

Dangling dick, naked butt-cheeks and all. I now see why the ancient Egyptians required their slaves to be nude. It adds so much to the cleaning process.

wildernessguru, shaking his fist at the fur-covered cat-tree: "I'm going to town on this motherfucker tonight!"

Far be it for me to dampen his enthusiasm.


ETa: One sock casuality, but it's his sock so I don't mind.

Comments

[twistedrecesses.livejournal.com]

I'm in the midst of a surpressed giggle-fit in the middle of a library, about to recommence the torture that is writing reaction papers in French.

*collapses onto the desktop in a giggly, giddy heap*

Maybe I need to cut back on the energy drinks...
*still giggling*

[icarusancalion.livejournal.com]

Forgive me if I supply more energy drinks, because that image of you snickering in the library was just too funny. Do you snicker in French?

Icarus

[twistedrecesses.livejournal.com]

Haha, unfortunately not. It's more along the lines of wide-eyed, shoulders shaking, hand over mouth, nearly-silent short breaths out through the nose for an extensive period of time, followed by a high-pitched *gasp* of an inhalation.

My thoughts are a scrambled gooey mess of French, English, and images though...that's always fun to sort through :)

[alchemine.livejournal.com]

Perhaps he can use the surviving sock to keep that dangling appendage warm? LOL

Catherine doesn't run from the vacuum, but she doesn't trust it either and won't get too close. She likes to sit on the stairs and supervise while I vacuum the living room, just to make sure the sneaky machine doesn't get out of hand.

[mad_maudlin]

Sometimes I think you've got the best boyfriend ever.

My cat doesn't really run from the vaccum, more like eyes it balefully from the cat condo. The puppy, on the other hand, runs from the vaccuum before it's even turned on.

[tekalynn.livejournal.com]

That's a startling, though compelling, image.

Our cat loved being vacuumed. He would throw himself in front of the vacuum until someone relented and brushed the wand over his fur several times.

[legionseagle.livejournal.com]

Nothing to do with the above (which nevertheless gave me a giggle) but since you must be coming round to the Creative Writing trauma of the week I wondered if you'd seen this (http://itre.cis.upenn.edu/~myl/languagelog/archives/003722.html) which was passed on to me by hedda62 when I was going through a similar trauma in my critique group.

[starrylizard.livejournal.com]

That image is rather adorable! :)

[enname.livejournal.com]

My approach to vacuuming?

Live in a house with no carpet. I don't think my cat has ever met a vacuum cleaner to run from. :)

Hee. I am assuming he has the lights on, otherwise he is vacuuming blind? : )

[jaig.livejournal.com]

You live such interesting lives.

[http://users.livejournal.com/meara_/]

Wanders through F-list in a haze of neo citron and vitamin C.

Thanks for the 'good morning' visual :) Being awake isn't all that bad now.

Did he de-fur the cat tree with any success?

[tigerlilly2063.livejournal.com]

*hehe* You always manage to make me smile and lighten up my day with these little stories.

[emeraldjay.livejournal.com]

"I'm going to town on this motherfucker tonight!"
I'm having really kinky visuals

[ethlinda.livejournal.com]

Phew. I'm not the only one.

[iibnf.livejournal.com]

Happy birthday, Ic, hope you have a buttock filled day!

[bruinsfan.livejournal.com]

Does he leave the drapes facing Shirtless Calesthenics Neighbor open as a sort of payback? ;-)

[harveywallbang.livejournal.com]

wow..
that's utterly fabulous...